Never Act Like A Jerk Again by Following These 7 Books’ Lessons

4 mins read
Photo by Tiago Felipe Ferreira on Unsplash

I might be exaggerating when saying this but it appears to me that, despite living in the officially known as ’developed’ part of the world, we are experiencing a rapid decline in manners and respect for your fellow human beings.

It is maddening the kinds of rude and blatantly hostile display of ‘in-your-face’ and ‘deal-with-it’ rude attitudes you have to deal with on a daily basis in a big city, especially from males. Being purposefully a jerk to everybody and females especially tragically became a cultural trend around the ’80s.

Put a stop to it. We must educate a whole generation of males about how the seemingly normal and innocuous behavior they picked up as children is actually really demeaning to most people.

If you are unsure if you express them, or don’t even know which behaviors they are, please do everyone around you a favor and get savvy on them by reading these books on how not to behave like a total douchebag. Many people would benefit from reading them. Be honest, are you one of them.

#1 Letters to a J.E.R.K by Amy O’Meara

You first pick it up hoping to find comfort in hearing from another woman about a situation when she was mistreated. But then, once this friendly girlfriend voice gets you hooked, the book has a slap ready for a reader.

The author breaks it to you: if you’ve been running into jerks that mistreat you it’s your own behavior that causes that. She “holds the mirror”, showing that your actions bring up these unwanted behaviors.

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#2 The Nocturnals: The Chestnut Challenge

In The Chestnut Challenge, Tobin, a sweet pangolin, Bismark, a loud-mouthed sugar glider, and Dawn, a serious fox, are playing a game of Chestnuts when Chandler, a conniving chinchilla, challenges Tobin for the title of Chestnut Champion. However, after a series of strange distractions occur, the Brigade begins to suspect that something is not quite right. Chandler is a competitive chinchilla…but could he also be a cheater?

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#3 How to Win Friends & Influence People by Dale Carnegie

Although this is an older book the principles espoused in it are as sound today as they were when it was written. Essentially the book instructs you to put yourself in the other person’s shoes in order to understand their wants or needs. Once you understand what is motivating someone you are in a position to influence them. Help someone get what they really want and they will usually help you get what you want.

  • Six ways to make people like you
  • Twelve ways to win people to your way of thinking

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#4 My Cat Won’t Bark! (A Relationship Epiphany) by Kevin Darné

The book is about learning how to approach relationships with complete awareness, having realistic expectations, and using self-empowerment techniques. My Cat Won’t Bark! is laced with several humorous anecdotes and has received some noteworthy positive editorial reviews from the likes of Publishers Weekly, Reader’s Favorite, and Midwest Book Review.

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#5 Get Out of Your Own Way Guide to Life: 10 Steps to Shift Gears, Dream Big, Do it Now! by Justin Loeber

Do you want to learn how to get out of your own way and build your strengths and eliminate your weaknesses? Do it now with Get Out of Your Own Way Guide to Life. Author Justin Loeber has put together an in-your-face, funny, no-nonsense, socio-business, coming-of-ageless handbook for anyone who is yearning for true, inner-personal success.

This shebang of a book is based on Loeber’s quirky personal life experiences that all started in the NYC 70s disco era. Justin worked as a waiter, a Wang Word Processing Operator (remember Wang?), a substitute go-go dancer, was discovered by pop icon Gary Numan in London and was one step from stardom in his own right as a solo pop-recording artist―only to lose it all.

Then, in a 180-degree turn―and without a college degree―he went from a temp at Random House to an EVP at HarperCollins in a little more than a decade. In 2006, Loeber created mouth: digital + public relations, a boutique agency in NYC―repping over 550 clients to date. And he uses his rollercoaster of life experience to show you how to get out of your own way―just like he had to.

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#6 The Leader Who Had No Title by Robin Sharma

In this book, the author – Robin Sharma explains how you can be just an ordinary worker no matter at what position you are in. Once you realize that we all are very much the same when it comes to being human, naturally we behave nicely with other people.

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#7 It Ends With You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction by Dr Tina B Tessina PH.d.

Jerks learn to be jerks in early childhood. Many parents have few tools to teach their children and little knowledge of how to provide a good example. As a result, family dysfunction and abuse often runs through succeeding generations like a snowball rolling down a hill, gathering speed and power as it goes.

Growing up, and learning to be responsible for yourself, is like standing at the bottom of that hill and not letting the dysfunction be passed on any further. It Ends With You. In 40 years of counseling people in recovery, licensed psychotherapist Tina Tessina has worked with many clients struggling with similar problems-anxiety, depression, feeling out of control, relationship disasters, and a pervasive feeling that they don’t know what “normal” is.

No matter how old they are, they don’t feel like they’ve really grown up. They never learned the confidence, self-motivation, and emotional management tools they need to live healthy, happy lives, because their families didn’t provide good role models, structure, and information. The exercises and guidelines in It Ends With You will help you finally understand what a functional family is, how its members are still affected by early experience, and how to develop the skills necessary for successful living and loving.

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Contributors to this article
Natasha Zolotareva from Natasha Zo

Crystal McCoy from Fabled Films Press, Nocturnals World

Kevin Darne from LoveAlert911

Brenda Knight from Mango Publishing

Rishit Shah from TallySchool

Tina B. Tessina from Dr. Romance’s Guide to Finding Love Today

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